Physical boundaries christian dating
You mentioned that he has had some trouble with this in the past..that's true, maybe he just doesn't want to go too far. On the other hand, maybe if you two kiss for a bit longer, and control yourselves, then you should have no problem. My girl friend accepts me for who I am and what I've done in the past and she knows that I've changed. Heck, we've even talked about if our relationship goes all the way to marriage!
One of the major characteristics of divine love is "Love suffers long and is kind" Genesis is one of the greatest examples of waiting.
"And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and I'm 18 and my girlfriend is 15.
We've been on and off this year, but now we've been going steady for about a month.
Sure, I've put my arm around her, held her hand..we haven't kissed.
We haven't done anything sexual either (thank goodness) and don't intend on it until marriage. I'm not going to intentionally make out with her until we get married, if that happens.
For some couples, they make out all the time and save sex for marriage no problem. From the sounds of it, you guys are doing just fine. I believe that good, made-to-be-together couples should have no problem talking about this or any other problem they are dealing with. We have no problem talking about my past problems/addictions.
I appreciate that he doesn't push it, but I really enjoy kissing him and would like to be kissed for more than a couple minutes.
I know he wants to wait until marriage because of his background, the way he lives his life and how he treats me and others, but we've never had a specific conversation about it.
(I agree we should, and fairly soon.) My problem is that, being completely inexperienced, I don't know how guys "work." I don't know what we can do without causing him problems or discomfort, but I find that he pulls away after just a couple of minutes of kissing (with a little tongue) and says "I guess I should go." Every time.
I'd like advice as to what is a good physical boundary in my new (3 months) relationship with my boyfriend.
We're 23/24, it's a first relationship for both of us, we are pretty serious (as we're both serious people who know ourselves well and know what we want), but that doesn't mean we want to compromise our values.
I would appreciate advice as to 1) how to talk to him about it and 2) what may be going on in his mind and body as our physical relationship progresses. If you are "serious," you talk to him just like you did here. You get to set your boundaries based on your values - not on whether he will leave if you have boundaries he doesn't like. The kissing is sweeter and will not be as long, or as often after you're married. As a dear friend said in one of his studies on godly courtship: The thing that we find about love is that love can wait.
Lust can never wait to get, but love can always wait to give.